Friday, March 16, 2007

Thanks, Thoughts and Trouble

First off, I want to say


to everyone who gave me advice on the situation. And you guys are right, I can't be too sure if he is the right guy.

But even then...I've been thinking, and it's probably too early for me to be worrying about all of this. It's a young relationship, and who is to say that it will even last six months from now let alone six days. Though I will not think that way...I generally try not to think pessimistically. So right now, I'll worry about right now. I'll worry about finishing up university and getting into medical school (though even at that I have quite a few more years to go lol). But I don't know...I'll cross that bridge when I get there. So if the time comes where I will think about telling my parents, then I will. But otherwise, my siblings all know, and two of them met him, so that will have to be good enough for now lol.

And for something that is so funny, or could be considered trouble (if you are the guy involved). But umm...let's just say that guys should not being looking for other women when they are already in a relationship lol. Enjoy!



Well Springbreak is almost over, and I'm heading back to the university on Sunday. All I have to say is talk about a dissappointment. Not only did I not get to go to the ASAC (African Students Association Convention) in Miami, Florida...I pretty much spent the entire break putting together a musical compilation for my school's upcoming African Heritage show, but also studied. But it will all pay off later on. Well here is the link for that convention website. Oh well...maybe I can go next year lol. Anyways...I'm off for more studying, trying to get that 4.0 lol. Have a good weekend! :-)

Monday, March 12, 2007

Bittersweet....

This post...I really don't know what to say. Well I mean I know what to say but I just have really mixed emotions right now.

I hung out with my boyfriend today and I had an AMAZING time. We kissed for like an hour or two as usual...omg....kissing him is great. He may not be the best kisser that I have ever had, but I know that he actually feels attracted to me. Like I can tell by his eyes and his body language and that is all I need. There is passion, and I love that. It hasn't been long, but I love his company, he makes me smile and all that good stuff.

We had a crazy day because I got my car stuck in the ditch of my sisters friend's house. And he was there and helped me get the car out...though now part of the girls' lawn is messed up lol.

But yeah, I care about this guy...I can seriously almost cry with how much that I care about this guy. The only problem (and the main reason that I cannot tell my parents about him) is because he is black-american. And I know...I know...I never thought that I would ever find myself in this position. I never thought that I would be dating a black-american, and yet here I find myself liking one...a lot. And in a relationship with one, and we really care about each other a lot. Am I supposed to just deny my feelings for this guy?

Okay...maybe I have not completely addressed the problem. So yeah...my parents have made it clear forever that any guy I would be in a relationship (and then eventually marry) would have to be either white or Nigerian. I used to think that that would not be hard, like I've had my "white boy" and my "Nigerian/African guy" phase (not that these have all permanently passed). But like I said before...I met this guy at a party one day and that was it. Though my last boyfriend was Nigerian (didn't tell my parents about him either though...that was the age thing lol).

They have made it clear that if I ever came back with a black boy they would disown me. And I don't want to be disowned...especially as a woman, it's hard. But I really care about this guy. He is sooo unbelievable sweet, and the things he says to me...I could fall in love with him. He's not like the average guy, and he's not ghetto or anything. So I don't know...I'm just not going to tell my parents for now...in fact I can't tell him why I can't tell my parents either...or at least I can't tell him right now.

That is my ordeal and any input would be great appreciated. I really need everyone's advice on this.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

So Far so GREAT!!!

So it has been a long time since I've updated about my life...I know my bad, my fault lol.

About the performance that we went to. So it was supposed to be like African Dance...but let me tell you, that looking nothing like African Dance to me, it was more like interpretive dance or something...but that thing was boring. The only thing that made it great was having Mr.B. with me :-)



We like flirted a lot before...then the performance came on and it was boring to the max. At first I was excited about it, but then as it continued...I was beginning to realize that this dance performance was NOT (I repeat NOT) what I thought that it would be.

So yeah...after the performance he asked me what I was doing later and I said nothing. So I decided to ask him what he was doing later, and he said nothing as well. So then he took my friend and I to the bus stop and we were chatting and he was joking around with me. And I pretended to be hurt by what he was saying, and then he put his arm around me :-D

So yeah...I put my arm around him and then after we got off the bus he walked me back to my dorm and went up to my room. And we were talking...but I could feel his arm slowly pulling me closer to him. And so then I was standing in front of him and I knew we were going to kiss. So we moved in closer...we about to kiss, but we both did this smile laughing then...and then we kissed! We kissed for a while, but I wasn't sure that it was the most appropriate thing in the world, so I asked him if he wanted to watch a movie. While watching the movie, he would keep kissing me and he had his arm around me the whole time. And when the movie ended we went back to my room and kissed some more.

So then I told him that I didn't want to just hook up and stuff and then we talked for a bit. And he told me how he wasn't trying to have a girlfriend because it would involve time and money. But I told him not to worry about that. And he said that he was trying not to like anyone, but he said that right now it's not working. He said how he likes me...in fact he "really likes me." Then he asked me to be his girlfriend! Okay...so he more like said "do you want me to ask you out now or later? It doesn't matter to me as long as it's headed in that direction." I mean....of course I said now!!! But yeah...after he asked me we were both all smiles and we kissed some more. And then we got on my bed ***Don't worry...it was all INNOCENT!!! lol*** and just laid next to each other. Then there was a couple pecking kisses. And then of course..I just couldn't believe the whole thing. So I was just like..."so I'm really your girlfriend now?" And he thought about it for a bit and was like "yeah." So that really made my Saturday night :-)

And so we went out again on Wednesday after class to grab lunch and we were at that "health food place" this time lol. But it was great, we flirted for a bit as usual lol. Then he had to leave because apparently he had hurt his hamstring and had to go to physical therapy for it. So I was walking him over and he said that he would come and see me later. Then as I'm on the bus to go back to my dorm, I get this phone call and he asks where I am. That he had talked to the trainer and they would do therapy tomorrow and so he was free for the next 2-3 hours. So he drove over and what did we do the entire time? We kissed lol...it was so great. Yeah...my roommate was in the room this time, so we took over one of the study rooms and locked the door and were in there for 2 hours lol. Okay...so maybe we didn't kiss the ENTIRE time lol. But there was a decent amount of kissing going on.

But yeah...so I have about a week off for break right now, and guess who I'll be seeing? My boyfriend...he has family that live in my area so he was going to come by and see them. Just so happens that I live around them and it will all work out. I plan on spending all of Monday with him...so it should be good. Bad thing is, I can't tell my parents...for multiple reasons...yeah.

So umm...I plan on enjoying that one day that I will spend with him lol.

And about that other guy...well he said that he will stop showing interest in my friends. He e-mailed me to wish me a good spring break though. He really is a nice guy, we'll just see how this all goes.

Later!

Friday, March 2, 2007

Boys are Trouble O!

Today's post is all about guys...and how they are trouble. Okay, not ALL guys are trouble, but some indefinitely like to cause trouble.

I was with some friends at a discussion and they happened to see this guy who made a comment and they thought that he was sooo cute.
So I told them that I knew him and that I would introduce them to him if they wanted. So I introduced them to him, and they tried to get him to go to this party that night, I told him that he should go because my friends want him too.

So I'm talking to one of my friends today over lunch, and I hear that he went to the party and was dancing with one friend. And then that friend's ex-bf came and she had to hang with him so then he started dancing with my other friend. He even kissed that friend...but then later as they we were leaving he went back to the other girl and got her number. And then he even called her today. So now there's a little "friendly competition" going on between these two friends. But we all know how "friendly competition" between girls end up.



So yeah...I don't need any fighting between my group of friends for real...like that just would not be cool at all. And like I told them both to just leave him because he is a flirt, but they don't listen. They just see this cute guy (I mean...I have to agree that he is cute, I was quite taken aback by his good looks the first time that I met him) and that's it.

So I don't know if I did the right thing or not...but I e-mailed the guy today. I told him to either pick one friend or none at all (though I would prefer him not going after either). There is seriously something wrong with this situation..might I just add that he is a graduate student and we are undergraduates? Well, yeah, so that's the situation. Like I just told him that and I said that I still think he's a nice guy, but that I just don't want any fights going on with my friends and that I really care about their feelings. And that I just wanted him to take what I said into consideration.

I won't say anything to them after that, I mean they are grown ups and know how to act...but I just...I just really wish that they would watch this one. I don't know, we'll see how this develops.

But for a story about a guy that's not causing problems. Hmm...I'm on airs and so happy about my date. It went great...just amazing. We joked around a lot and it was just really relaxed...we seriously lost track of time just talking and then he walked me back to the bus stop. Haha...really romantic right?

Yeah, we went to the Mexican place and I got nachos even though my friends told me not too...but I'm addicted to those chicken nachos lol, can't do anything about that :). He has the most beautiful smile that I've ever seen...like it's sincere and just adorable. And sometimes when he would look down, all I could think was...this guy is just sooo beautiful. Like I could not believe that someone this beautiful and smart (he's studying engineering) and sweet and funny and sincere just totally amazing guy could exist. But he does...and I found him first lol.

Gosh he makes me smile lol. And I love sending him flirty text messages lol. Like yesterday I texted him and told him that I hope he had a good day even though I wasn't there to make him smile...nevermind I just did. That was what I said to him...and then today I called him. And we're going to go and see a performance together tomorrow!!! I hope it goes well...maybe I might even get a kiss lol.

Ohh I'm too excited, wish me luck.

Well anyways...like I promised here are two great mp3s that I really hope you enjoy.

Modenine- Cry

JJC & 419 Squad- Atide

Have a good weekend everyone...and wish me luck!