Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Crazy Week

So it's been a long time since I've blogged...well not so long time, a little over a week. Nothing much in particular happened over the week except my same friend who sent the flowers over Valentine's Day made it clear that apparently he was "falling in love with me." Which well...saddens me of course, because I've told him over and over again that we are just friends and I even told him that there is this other guy that I like.

Which speaking of the other guy...we have a:



Okay...so let me tell you about this guy. He is tall (6'4" to be exact). Adorable, sweet, toned/slightly built. He plays football so he has a good body. Let me clarify that....he plays American football lol. I always run into him at like dance parties, and like once we start dancing...we dance together the entire time....like around 1/2 - 1 hour...who knows because time flies when you're having fun.

Yep, for Wednesday...I am sooo excited. All I can think about is how I'm going to do my hair what I should wear...where to eat. I don't want to eat somewhere messy and end up embarrassing myself...because sometimes messy foods seem to have an affinity for my clothing lol. It's not a serious date, don't get any ideas lol...just going to grab lunch. There are some good places to get food around campus:

1.) There is this Mexican place..it's really chill. Dim lighting with neon colored lights (even in the daytime lol) and it's not formal, but there are little tables and booths around.

2.) Then there is this like "health food" kind of place. Has salads and wraps, really chill, favorite hang out spot on campus with lots of booths and long tables. Obviously...there are no cloths on these tables or the previous place mentioned. And brightly lit busy and bustling lol.

3.) We could always go to McDonalds...but I don't think that would be a good idea.

4.)And then there is a place that's like the Mexican place, but it's more like the other place with the healthy foods. So it's slightly dim with lots of colors, but serves salad, wraps and pasta. Almost like a Starbucks...but with food.

5.)And there is Subway.

So those are my options...I'm thinking Mexican. I just hope that I don't mess up my clothes. I'll be sure to say what exactly I chose to wear along with what happened. So wish me luck!!!

Saturday Night...quite a story. So I went to the Africa Night show that a local University had. It was a great show, from the stories to the clothing. OMG...the fashion that they had at the show was amazing.



That was actually not from the show itself...but it might as well be. All I know is, that now I have the guys number and where the place is located...and I have a credit card that I promise will the maxed out by the time I am done at his store lol.

But everything was perfect until it ended. You would not believe who I saw there...will not believe. I saw my ex-boyfriend!!!

Yes, I was shocked to say the least, I could not believe it. He came along with some of his cousins to see the show and to surprise me. Can you believe it...drove two hours to surprise me!!! At first, I was like.."hide me!!" to some of my friends. But he had seen me already so I went up to him and his family and said hi and things. And he gave me back my necklace (and to think my friends said that now I would not get it back). But I did. But I was really surprised to see him there.

But that kind of brings up a saddening aspect of what was our relationship. He drove two hours to see a show as well that went on for one night. And yet...though I had not seen him since December...he never drove down during how many months to see me. There were too many things wrong with the relationship...but whatever. I'm over it, I have a hot date on Wednesday, and I can't wait for it.

On another...completely unrelated note lol. Busola...do you have a blog or something? Lol...like I feel like responding to you on my own blog is kind of funny lol. But umm...no worries.

And I leave you here with one of my favorite Nigerian songs...Atide by JJC & the 419 Squad. I love this song...so look out for that mp3 in my next post if I don't forget. Hopefully....I should have Modenine's Cry as well. So until next time!

Monday, February 19, 2007

Updates Updates UPDATES!!!!

My life this weekend has been absolutely crazy. Okay...not soo crazy, but interesting all the same.

First things first, my boyfriend and I did break up. It really ended on a bad note, or more of an uncertain note. So I called him just to say hey and what's up, wasn't really planning on breaking up with him. Just wanted to chat on Friday because I had called him on Valentine's Day to say all that good stuff, and he said he would have to call me back, and no calling back. So I decided that I should just call him back myself. Called him, and then I remembered that I had left a necklace of mine at his house and I just wanted to know if he could mail it back because it's been there for about three months now. And then he started to make a big deal asking if that is what I had called him about. And I was like "no, I just called you because I wanted to see how you were doing and I remembered the necklace, and I just wanted you to mail it back to me."

So then he calms down and he was like, yeah, I'll mail it to you. And then proceeds to talk about something else. But then I remember to make sure that he had my mailing address. So then I say, do you want me to give you my mailing address? And he told me to send it through e-mail. I didn't want to send it through e-mail because there were easier ways to send it. So I asked him, do you want me to send it to you through an inbox at an online community since we were both members, and I was already logged in. He then tells me that he was kicked off, like he tried to login, and it wouldn't let him. And I asked him what he did to get kicked off. And he tells me that he did nothing. But I'm a little confused, so I tell him that they don't just kick people off for no reason, like he must have done something. So then he tells me how he contacted the people who own the website and told them about it. And they didn't do anything, so then he told them to "kiss his black ass." And he asks me if I thought something was wrong in him telling them that. And of course there is something wrong in him telling them that. So I told him that I didn't think that it was right. He proceeds to get mad at me saying that I always blame him for things. Just like I said that it was his fault that he got the parking ticket. (In case I didn't mention it, he drove his car to school one day even though he didn't have a parking permit. And his car got towed. He said the reason he decided to drive the car to school was because it was cold and he didn't want to walk). But at that point, I just could not believe that he was going to get mad at me for giving my opinion on something, that opinion that he asked for.

So then he gets silent. Says absolutely nothing to me. So I ask him if he's mad at me. Then he decides he wants to ask me why I want to know. I tell him that I just want to know, "are you mad at me." He then replies with "what difference does it make?" I reply again, "I just want to know, are you mad at me?" He then tells me that I'm looking for a reason to be mad at him. So then I tell him that I'm not looking for a reason to be mad at him, I just want to know if he's mad at me. He asks me another pointless question again. I ask him why he just can't answer the question because he was quite for a long time, and I want to know if it's because you're mad at me. Then he replies "maybe." So then I just told him you know, this is just not working out. And said that we should break up. He remains silent for a while. I hang on the line to see if he'll say anything, he says nothing. So then I say that if he won't say anything, then I'm just going to hang up the phone. I hang on for a bit to see if he'll say anything, still silent. So then I just hung up the phone. Then I waited 5 minutes, called him back, no answer. Called him back again, still no answer. Called him back like 5 times the next day, still no answer, always the voice mail. I told my friends, and all they could say was "thank God, it was about time you broke up with him!"

And all I have to say that I couldn't agree more, it really was about time. And he did actually answer the phone when I called him on Sunday night, but I was on the way to a party so we didn't talk long. He asked me if I really wanted to break up...yes I did!

I tried to find a funny break-up clip on you tube...and there kind of was not any. So I'll just leave you to this clip. It's Australian...didn't watch all of it but it seemed alright from what I saw lol.



And about Friday night (the night I broke up with my bf) my friends went out the club, saw some strippers. And apparently they were really bad. They told me about this guy who was called 6'2" or something but apparently he looked more like 4'2" lol...allegedly he is 5'4" lol. And then they had this run in with this like 54 year old guy who gave them a ride back that apparently is here on a marriage visa, but then the marriage fell through and he was looking for a girl to marry lol. And there was a car full of girls!!! Haha lol. Overall, I'm happy with my idea to stay in my dorm and go to sleep lol.

Ummm....my school's African Club through a party at a local school club with some white fraternities and sororities so that we would get a really good turnout. And it went well, we're all like really happy about it. I know I sure am, we must have had like 300+ people there. And with a charge of $5 per person...we made so much money to go to charity. So we are like really excited about it. And I happened to meet this guy that was a year older than me and we danced for about an hour until it was over. Not a new guy, but it's the same guy that I had danced with at another party for half and hour in the beginning of the school year. I believe I first met him in October, and I was like instantly attracted. Like I saw him when I had walked into the club, and I was like...I want to dance with that guy!!! Haha....yeah, but like we danced and stuff, didn't get his number or anything. And we went our separate ways. I couldn't stop thinking about this guy. Then I got a boyfriend, and I saw this guy that I will call Will around campus a lot. He even gave me $30 when my school was fundraising for Uganda. So that was nice of him.

But this time, we talked a bit while dancing, and he held me around the waist a lot and even held my hand!!! *Sigh* and did I happen to mention that he is 6'4" and plays football. Yeah...he had lifted up his t-shirt to wipe some of the sweat off of his face, and I definetly saw this amazing 6 or 8 pack under his shirt. But you know...like I said, I'm not looking for a relationship right now, we'll probably just be friends lol. But he's really cute...cute, not sexy. But I like cute guys anyways though...but no relationship, seriously.

Ohhh, I almost forgot, about the guy that sent me flowers. So we've been talking and stuff, and he tells me yesterday night that the more we talk, the more he likes me. He tells me that if I just want to be friends, then that's great, but I want to be girlfriend and boyfriend, then he is fine with that. I just want to stay friends, like I've said already.

I don't really know what makes guys like me so easily. I mean...I know there is that whole idea that girls and guys can't just be friends, but is that really true? Why can't people of the opposite sex just remain friends?

Anyways...here's a cute video that I should have put up for Valentine's Day...my fault. But it's Justin Timberlake's last song called "My Love." This is such an amazing song.



But for something really funny, I stole this from I don't even know who's blog, but I thought it was hilarious. All about Nigerian parents lol. Because we all know how they are :-)

Friday, February 16, 2007

Valentine's Day is Over and So is the Love....

Valentine's Day has come and gone...and it has left me with a question. Why is it that so many people hate Valentine's Day? And I know...it's a day of love, and not everyone has one, but I still don't understand why. This was my first Valentine's Day with someone as my Valentine, but I still never hated it. I mean, I always celebrated it dressed in pink for classes. And here at university, a friend asked me...why are so many people wearing pink? Well, it's Valentine's Day and that's just what people do...or at least in my high school they did. But anyways, let me get to the heart of this whole thing.

So I know that I said that I was very much in love with my boyfriend, but now I'm beginning to wonder if I really am. Or If I say I love him just for the sake of it because he loves me. We've been dating for almost 5 months now, and he's Nigerian as well. He actually caught me at a time when I did not want a relationship, but now I come to think about it, do I really even want one now? So we go to school 2 hours away from each other, he's 24 and I'm 18...big difference sort of. He also has the whole idea that we will get married and stuff. Which I don't even want to talk about, because when he starts saying "can you teach our daughter to be just like you?" that really creeps me out.

I haven't seen him in more than two months now, and we talk on the phone. But it's just beginning to feel like we just play phone tag on the phone. Like I call him, he doesn't answer so I leave a message. He calls me I don't get a chance to answer and then it continues like that for maybe a day, then we talk on the phone for a bit and then something comes up, he says he'll call me back. And then a day or two maybe a whole weekend goes by, he doesn't call. So then I call him and that phone tag thing happens all over again. I'm really just frustrated at times with the whole thing because I don't feel like I have a boyfriend. And he's my first real boyfriend and it's just not the way I would ever see it happening. And the fact that I feel like it's something I can't tell my parents because they would not approve, I mean, he's not even financially stable, doesn't have a steady job and is only 2 years ahead of me in university. It's a disaster waiting to happen. And he got mad at me because I told him how it was his fault that he got a parking ticket...does that seem fair to you? I told my friends about it, and they said that he's crazy and I should dumb him. But at the same time, I don't want to dump him because it would hurt his feelings.

But I'm beginning to realize, that I should begin to think about my feelings. I need to love myself properly and focus on my school and my dreams of becoming a doctor and let things fall as they may. I want to be able to enjoy my university life, and not feel like I'm being tied down to this guy who even though he says he loves me, it doesn't feel like it. And did I mention that what he gave me for Valentine's Day was a text message? Haha...hmm, I didn't even really think about that until just now. Well, it's not like that's why. But I've tried breaking up with him before and it just doesn't work. Like I'll say it, and he'll be so hurt and I feel bad so I take him back. But no more...I'm thinking about me this time, and I will seriously break it off. I don't want any male attention like that anymore...for a while.

And did I happen to mention that I was at the club with some friends about 3 weeks ago and I met this guy, turns out to be 35. Desperate times called for desperate measures at that point, and my friends left me hanging at the club. No cash for a cab...and I got a ride back to school with this guy. Bad idea...not only did I not hear the end of it from my friends, but this guy just does not stop bothering me. Calling like he's trying to be interested in my life. This guy is a black-american might I add. So today he's telling me how Black-American's feel that Africans look down on them So then I said, maybe that's because they look down on us. And he's like...no we don't look down on you all, that's because the media portrays it that way. So I'm just thinking like, whatever. I don't know why I'm talking to this guy, he's just weird. I told him that I was 17 as a joke, but since he believed it and continues to talk to me, I was just going to play along. But anyone would think that there is something wrong with a 35 year old talking to a 17 year old. And he's like actually trying to have a relationship. I seriously get myself into some really dumb situations sometimes. But at least my friends know about it...actually, we're kind of using him in a way lol. But honestly, I think he deserves it for talking to underage girls. Usage in terms of rides and alcohol...I personally don't drink, but he got it for some friends. And now that we have upperclassman friends that are legitimately now over 21, don't need him anymore. I seriously am torn between feeling awful about it because in a way he doesn't deserve that...but I seriously think he might. He's told me that he's taken the virginity of girls like 16, 17, 18....somebody like him should probably be reported to the cops. But yeah, I'm about to block his number once I figure out how to do that. This whole thing...is not me.

And my friends are heading out to the club today because there's this strip thing going on tonight. Yeah...male strippers. I went with them one time because it was a friend's birthday, but there is no way I'm going tonight. It's just not me, it's like I feel myself changing. University is about changing...but not like this. Like the last time I went...thank goodness they didn't strip all the way down. But like they would come into the crowd, and there were probably about like 30 people in total, and when they would come near me, I would run behind a friend. Like...I don't know what these people have. It was great to watch my friends and all, but not around me. No way... And I was talking to another Nigerian friend and told her about it, and she was like what would you're parents think. And that's it...what would they think??? I really think I should be ashamed, okay I am ashamed...but what's done is done. The only thing that I can do is change my tomorrow, and today for that matter by not going out tonight.

I think my teenage experimenting is over...like I hadn't even kissed a guy before I came to university, and now a strip club...well it's not a strip club, they only do that once a month in a separate room, but yeah. I'm done for real. Okay, so I never really went wild either. My friends always tell me that I don't go out and that I need to go out more. But I don't mind going out...I like trips to the mall, movies, hanging out in the dorms, chilling, but I don't want to go clubbing all the time. I'm not really a clubbing person. I've probably gone about 5 times ever since I started university in August...and that's enough to last me for the rest of my school years. Like I don't plan on becoming some sort of bookwork or anything. I still plan on excitement.

But if I've learned anything...don't do things you're not comfortable with, love yourself, and well...continue to read my blog to know what else I learn lol. I'm not a bad girl though, please don't get that impression of me, I'm really not. I like to think of myself as being in the process of learning what I want. So I'll tell you how it goes on my road to being single lol.

But since that was kind of a heavy subject...time for another drum roll please...:

LAUGH OF THE DAY!!!! LOL

This clip comes to you from one of the best British comedies ever, Three Non-Blondes. Love this show. She goes in trying to buy a house for her family...and just watch as the craziness unfolds!!!



Well...I'm off to get ready for class now. Until my next post, I'm off.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Valentine's Day 2007!!!

Hey Everyone!

First off I just want to wish you all a very HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! And everybody has a Valentine whether you are with someone or not. Because if you're not in a relationship, you can always just be your own Valentine. Because it's also important love yourself. I mean you do have to love yourself before you can properly love another.

So anyways, in honor or Valentine's Day I want to post some love songs that you call can download. These are my favorite love songs that I happen to have on my computer right now. And they are Nigerian tracks lol...but there is a little India.Arie included. Don't hurt me for that lol.

So here are my like favorites that I currently have on my computer, share them with your love or yourself, sorry for the cheesyness lol.

Paul Play- Angel of My Life

Styl-Plus - Mase

2Face Idibia- Ole

Paul Play- You and Me I love this track soo much, soo sweet!!!

Sunny Nneji- Oruka

2Face Idibia- African Queen

Lauryn Hill- Can't Take My Eyes Off of You Okay so I lied...another non-nigerian track.

India.Arie- Promises not exactly a love song, but I love it all the same. Now I'm thinking, I should have Video on here...hmm, that will be a thought.

I may have to fix those links though, so I'll edit them after class.

So everybody rent some sweet touching love movies and get on your way.

But it's funny that on Valentine's Day I happen to have a little bit of a dilemma. So I have a boyfriend whom I love very much. But this male friend that I have called me and said that he wanted to send me flowers for Valentine's Day to make me happy. Like he had never done it before and he wanted to send some to me. I said to him that I can't accept those from him because it wouldn't be right. And I asked him why he wanted to send them because we're just friends. And he said that he knew that we were friends and that he didn't want to make me feel uncomfortable but he feels I'm a nice person and just wants to send them. And he wanted to send me the flowers for being a good friend.

So tell me, would you accept these flowers or not? And I already told my boyfriend about it. Like I don't want to read too much into this and have it be nothing, and he sent me a text message as well saying how he hoped that I was smiling because it's Valentine's Day. I made it clear that we're just friends...or maybe I didn't make it clear enough. But he seemed to understand what I had said. What do you guys think about this?

This post is not over...class is just over so I have to get to my next one.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Homeward by Bassey Ikpi2

Hey...this is actually an edit to the post that I had made last year on the poem of Bassey Ikpi called Homeward. I got those lyrics from her website, but I didn't realize that they didn't match up with the video that I gave you. Which is my fault, I should have checked first. I think she shortened it for her performance. So I've fixed it and will give it to you again.





Homeward

Today, I remember my grandmother
As she attempts to connect with her second children
she finds the only english words she knows
from somewhere hidden in the belly of her 4 foot 9 inch body
and instead of awonke she greets us with "bye bye"
beckoning us into her thin clay colored arms
Those arms mothered my mother
taught her how to mother me
I inhale the history from her skin
And she tells me of the small scared girl carried away on an iron bird to America
Seems like that same bird has returned only to replace
that perfect girl with me
this strange tongue tied woman,
the one that can barely say hello
without the clicks and moans the dips and tones of the white man's language

It breaks my heart to realize that
I can only love her clearly in English
But this is not my only tongue
Insolent and heavy with the awkward movements of amber waves
east or west this is not my village
and my heart still longs for my grandmother's voice
steady and strong crossing rivers and oceans
rounding buildings of mud, thatched roof
steel and glass
concrete and confusion
Yet I am afraid that it will not find me here
in this land miles
from the one that welcomed me into this world
lifetimes before I existed in this cosmopolitan space

"nbong non yin ben yami?"
"nbong non yin ben yami?"
what will I teach my children?
what will I tell them of where I've been
the earth that shaped me
the hands that held me
what will they call home
and will they hear it if and when it calls them

oklahoma
DC
brooklyn
will not help me remember
ikom
ugep
calabar
they will also not let me forget fingers sticky with fuu fuu
swallowed whole
tongues stinging numb from plantain fried in palm oil
But I have lost the grit and the grain of my grandmother's gari
I can't taste past this nostalgic lump in my throat
can't stomach the reality of this my divided culture
African
American
I am everything
And I am nothing
Nigeria quietly begs me to remember
While America slowly urges me to forget
but it's for my past
It's for my future
it is for my children
and it is for you, grandmother
that I must
always
always
remember

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Sooo.....

So I should be studying for my Microbiology exam that I have on Monday. But with my laptop in front of me like this, I find it a little hard to resist the temptations of my computer. So here I am...on blogger...and not studying.

And I have discovered two comments...well, one on two different posts, but that excites me a bit all the same lol.

Hmm...so I guess I should give the update from my last post about my roommate. Really, I made it into a bigger deal than it was. And I did talk to my roommate about it. A nice calm 1 minute talk lol. And she apologized for it, twice at that. It was nice, but our relationship is still the same. Never really talk, I never really see her. I guess it might not be that bad of a relationship...maybe. But I don't know...it still kind of bothers me that she never told me about it and rather I had to be the one to bring it up.

I guess I should also tell you the story that I was told. Basically it was that she had left the room, and so he was left alone in the room while he was drunk. And then he got on my computer, she came back and saw him. Told him that the laptop was her roommates, and then he was like "hold on, I'm almost done." And that is all I know.

I basically forgot about the whole thing.

Funny...I know I have some stuff that I meant to write about when it happened. But it all seems to have escaped my mind. So I guess I'll just ramble until I remember some stuff.

So my parents decided that I can't get a second job tutoring school children like I wanted. The reason being that they don't want me to have an off campus job. Which sucks because that one pays 4 dollars more than my current job. Which my current job, as much as I was excited for it before, I have decided that really it's not all that it's cracked up to be.

I basically work as a telemarketer lol...calling people and asking them to donate money to my school. It gets tedious after calling people and talking on the phone for 3 1/2 hours lol. But it's extra cash, which I won't turn down. And it's my first job, so I have this great sense of...yeah...I worked for that lol.

One of my best friends here at school went out to the club last night. The same club that we often frequent and get into interesting situations. Haha...so there was one time that we went to this club, and there were male strippers!!! Yes, strippers. Okay, touchy subject of college students and strippers lol. But yeah, one of my friends was friends with this girl that was turning 19, and she had her party at the club and they got her strippers. Okay, this is too much of a long story to share right now, but I'll be sure to talk about it in a later post.

But so I was sitting in my friends room with another friend getting ready for this party. Which it turns out, that a lot of college students at my school ended up going to. I'm actually glad I didn't go, because I'm getting tired of the parties at my school with always the exact same music and the exact same people.

I don't know why I keep going off on tangents, but like we were just sitting there and talking. And we got to the subject of crazy guy incidents that have happened at clubs and just at parties at school. And I just think it's funny how the upperclassman always go after young freshman girls.

There is this one fraternity on campus, that you always see hanging around the freshman. Seriously, always hanging out with the freshman. And then I've been told of which freshman girls have been sleeping with the upperclassman. And I just feel that it's sad you know. Like, maybe it's just because my parents taught me well that I know all of this. But like...I just wish these girls would know how to respect themselves and just not treat their bodies like somebody else's trash.

It's sad when there are girls that I'm friends with and are told that they've "slept with most of the guys in one fraternity." It's demeaning...it really is. And I've had my share of stupid things that I have done, but thank goodness it was nothing like that. So if there is anything that anyone takes out of this, it's just that I wish girls will just stop sleeping around. Because upperclassmen guys talk, they really do. I have been told by my older brother and upperclassmen boys themselves. You don't want to earn a bad reputation. So just please...mind what you do.

TIME FOR MY LAUGH OF THE DAY

So on a better note. I have discovered some hilarious clips on youtube.com all about this woman called Little Miss Jocelyn. Too too funny lol. So I want you guys to check some out. I'll post some of my favorites here. But if you want more, then just check out youtube and search Little Miss Jocelyn.

This one is all about a new take on racism. The young guy in this clip is pretty cute :-) So you have your eyecandy in there as a bonus as well lol.


Jocelyn trying to get a cab.


And one of her as a bus driver. And this one is my absolute favorite lol.


Okay...so I guess I should be saving up some of those laughs for a better time. But..everyday there's always something to laugh about.

Why might I want a laugh of the day for my blog. Because I essentially am a jokester, but I won't be lying in my posts though. I might tell you a funny story, but that would be it lol. Well I need to get back to studying. But when I procrastinate again, I'll be sure that this is a place that I will hit up lol.

Later!

Sunday, February 4, 2007

My Roommate

Okay...so I always knew that there were little things about my roommate that would just get on my nerves and bother the heck out of me. Like I would come back and see crumbs on my desk or stains on my desk from food that she had cooked. Granted that only happened like twice, it was still disrespectful. And then the fact that I'm always the one that cleans OUR fridge. But I don't say anything because she's my roommate and I know that I'm going to be stuck with her for a while. So I'd rather just not say anything and not get jeopardize our fragile relationship. Because even as it is, I rarely see her. I could go for three days and not see her, and when I do see her, it's just a "hi" and a "bye."

So this has been something that has just overstepped the bounds this time. So I leave my laptop on my desk, sometimes I leave it open, sometimes I close it. So even though my roommate hasn't told me, I've gathered clues that she has a boyfriend. Okay...so really I found out on Facebook that she has a boyfriend, but she never told me. And from her conversations...she has mentioned this guy named Myles, whom I've gathered to be her boyfriend. Which is all besides the point. So I come to my room and sometimes when I leave my laptop open, I notice that like it's not asleep even though I have been away from the laptop for a long time. So I had this idea that she was letting someone use my computer while I was away. But I just couldn't believe that such would happen, so I just figured maybe leaving instant messenger open was doing that.

So I come to my computer this morning to check out the address of this hairdresser that I'm going to today. I open google.com and there is this e-mail address signed in...onto a google account on my computer!!!!!! And it's not one of my friends...not even anyone that I know, but guess what??? Guess who's name is under the account??? Myles!!!! Can you believe that???? She let her freakin' boyfriend use MY LAPTOP when I was NOT IN THE ROOM. And not only that...but I DON'T EVEN KNOW THIS GUY!!! I have never seen him before in my life! So tell me that I don't have the right to be upset. I don't know how else to put this, but that is incredible disrespectful!!! Argh...I want to just...I'm just mad.

I wrote her a note that we have to talk. I can't believe that I would have to put my laptop under a lock and key in my own room. But whatever. If I have to do it, then I will. But I seriously have lost a lot of respect for my roommate and I just don't trust her. That she would not give me the common decency to not let some random guy use my computer. Not just my computer, but just not touch my stuff at all. I feel so betrayed, because honestly...I didn't see it, she never would have told me. I just need to know how to go about this whole thing. I will honestly yell at her if I can't calm down. Hopefully I will be calm when I see her and tell her. Otherwise...I can tell you right now that all hell is about to break lose!