New Stuffs....

So the boyfriend and I broke up...and I've been talking to the Ghanaian guy. But now he tells me that he hasn't been completely honest with me and that he has something to tell me. I'm just thinking...NOT AGAIN!!!!

Hey!

Sorry for the hiatus :-( Classes have started, so don't expect me to post too much. It might be twice a week...or less.

So what have I been up to lately?

Well...packing, unpacking, african party, friends, church...pretty standard stuff.

Thanks for everyone's advice, but I guess I didn't need it, as things have a way of sorting themselves out. I actually have quite a bit to tell you about, but I feel like the story is not over yet, so we'll have to wait until Friday to know how the whole situation ends.

Some things that you might be interested to know is that I finally told A parent (my mom) about my AA boyfriend. She wasn't that happy...but she wasn't upset. She just wanted to make sure that it's not serious, and I assume that she is not telling my dad about it. She gave me the impression that he would be very very very upset. Drama surrounds that Ghanaian guy...which is the story that you all will have to wait for. And to clear things up...I hope that no one thinks that I am cheating on my bf, because I'm not. Like...when I kissed the other guy, we were on break...and we're actually on a break now. Classes have started...and I don't need ANY distractions. Well...maybe I could do with a couple lol.

Anyways, I've got e-mails and stuff to send out, meetings to attend, and I room that's not yet clean lol. I'll Talk to you all later! Take care and bye!

Advice

Sooo...

Life is going horribly wrong for me at this point. Well not HORRIBLY wrong, but it's just different. And let's just say that I can't really cope with it. So right now, I'm just going to ask for advice.

So since I last updated everyone, a LOT of things have changed. For the simple rundown of it all....
*Boyfriend and I decided to take a break
*The Ghanaian guy and I kissed...and got pretty close. Emotionally that is...not physical. But we have kissed...a lot!
*Boyfriend and I got back together after a day of being upset and crying.
*I also got sick and had to be on medication for the past week.
*Needless to say....the combination of all this and the fact that I had a third test and a final for my class resulted in a not so pleasing grade.

Now here is the major dilemma...I like both of the guys. I mean...I love my boyfriend. But I know at this point that my parents would never accept him. Though they did meet him and have a good conversation with him when I was moving out. This Ghanaian guy...he's cute, sweet, just a really nice guy. But of course, parents also met him move out day and they had stuff to say as well. My mom of course kept asking me about our relationship...like what kind of friends we are. She knows I would never admit to being in a relationship with anyone to her...at least not for a while. So anyways...my mom was like...stay away from Ghanaian men, they are loose. They don't stay in marriages (which ironically enough his parents are divorced).

And then part of me also tells me to forget about them both and just focus on school. I decided that I was still interested in going to medical school but I plan on getting my MD/MBA...but, I have to get good grades. And this summer kind of sucked for that. My parents are right, I am getting distracted...and that's why part of me just wants to dismiss them both and guys altogether. I don't know. I just need some advice here. Any and all is welcome.

And my boyfriend is actually fully aware of my feelings for this other guy.

Help!!!

?????

Don't expect a post until Sunday!

♥ ELNG

Music Tag and CONFUSED!!

Well...I got tagged for music tag. Been putting it off, but I might as well do it now lol. So here are the rules:

Put your i-tunes/music player/Nokia N95 on shuffle

For each question press the ‘next’ button to get your answer

You must write the name of the song down no matter what!!!

After you’ve answered all the questions tag 5 other people and let them they’ve been tagged and to do the meme themselves:

If someone says ‘is this okay?’ You say:
I'm a G - Young Joc ft. T.I.
I usually say it is...unless I am seriously opposed to it. I don't like to be controlling...but don't take that to mean I let people walk all over me. I stand up for myself when I need to.


What would best describe your personality?
The Boogie Monster- Gnarles Barkley
I have a monster in my closet? Haha...well, let's just say that I'm really nice, but not everyone knows EVERYTHING about me. I guess that makes me a little mysterious.

What do you like in a guy/girl?
Anxiety - Black Eyed Peas ft. Papa Roach
I really like a guy who can make me laugh...not even like, that's a requirement. Everything else can be negotiable...well except the fact that he has to be educated, smart, has a plan, loyal, caring...and have a great smile!

How do you feel today?
The Breathless - Acceptance
YepYep...breathless at the turn of events in my life.


What is your life’s purpose?
Reggae Night- Jimmy Cliff
To make a difference.

What do your friends think of you?
Thy Hand Belinda and When I Am Laid In Earth- Henry Purcell
They think I'm nice, which is correct.


What do you think of your parents?
Can't Buy Me Love- Michael Buble
I absolutely adore my parents in every single way. Even when they are hard on me...really strict and everything, I know they do it because they love me. All of the sacrifices that they have made for my siblings and I...I don't even know where to begin to repay them. I can only hope that I can be half as good a parent to my children as they were to me.

What do you think about very often?
Boyfriend Girlfriend- C-side
Hmmm....very ironic. I think about my boyfriend/ex-bf a lot and still do. But I also think about school and my future a lot...I just need to stay really committed.


What is 2+2?
Bosoe- Joe Mensah
It's either 4 or 22...depending on how you look at it.

What do you think of your best friend?
Nwantiti (U drive me Crazy)- Komo
My best friend is my bf/ex-bf. I can tell him everything! He knows everything about me and understands me completely.


What do you think of the person you like?
Good Morning Sunshine - Aqua
They are my sunshine I guess...

What is your life story?
Denial - Sugababes
Hmmm....that word probably sums it up actually. I deny there is something that I can't do...etc.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Be Ur Man- Blackface
A famous medical doctor and entrepreneur. I also want to be happily married with a lovely family :-)


What do you think when you see the person you like?
That's Life - Michael Buble
I want to be in their arms...and be graced with a kiss of course.

What do your parents think of you?
Paris, Tokyo- Lupe Fiasco
They love me! They are proud of me really...I can only try.

What will you dance to at your wedding?
Hadiza- Styl-Plus
Actually...I will be dancing to Michael Jackson's "Lady of My Life." There are too many songs to list, but they will be cheesy love songs...yes!!!


What will they play at your funeral?
Iseju Akan- Tony Tetuila
I am not going to plan my funeral music because I do not plan to die.


What is your hobby/Interest?
Used to Love U- John Legend
I love love LOVE to cook...that is a big hobby. I also pay too much attention to Nigerian movies, I like to read, I am addicted to the news, and I love hanging out with friends and family.


What is your biggest secret?
Always on My Mind- Styl-Plus
As if I am going to put it on here...

What do you think of your best friends?
I Want you - Lloyd ft. Lil Wayne
Yep...that's me and my best friend. I want him, but things are complicated.

What should you post this as?
Either Way - Guster
A post...

I'm not tagging anyone for this...just because I say so.

*******

For the story today:

Well, my bf/ex-bf are in an odd place right now. We are taking a two month break...but we still act like we are going out. Holding hands and kissing and stuff...but things changed last night.

I hope you recall from a couple posts back when I said that there was this Ghanaian guy that I wanted to set a Ghanaian friend up with. He came over to my apartment yesterday...and long story short...he kissed me...for a decently long period of time. And I kind of let him. If you all really want details...I can post it later. I shouldn't have let that happen...but I am somewhat attracted to him. I know that's the point of this break, to try other people. Just so that we are sure that we are meant for each other. The break was moreso for me because he really wants me to tell my parents about him by the end of the year. But you all know the story, I'm not sure about telling my parents. They would be completely against the relationship because he's black-american.

And of course bf/ex-bf is sending me mixed signals. Keeps telling me to try him out...and that hopefully soon I will realize that he is the best guy for me. But then he at times tells me to just tell him that I am in love with someone else and not interested. To be honest...I am a little interested. Maybe it's because I want to take the easy way out. But at the same time, I don't know what my parents will do when I tell them. Will they make me change schools, stop paying my school fees, force me to break up with him...etc? This all referring to bf/ex-bf. I guess I should let things play out for a bit...

: - /

I know I'm supposed to do that song question tag thing...but I'll have to put it off again. Don't really plan on tagging anyone for it anyways.

So my boyfriend came back a couple of days ago...or should I say ex-bf. Decided yesterday to take a two month break...date other people. You know, see if things were really meant to work out.

The Story of the Weekend

Okay, as you know, this past week was my birthday! Nothing much happened on the actually birthday, just went and bought some cake , and juices for my birthday celebration on Friday night. I also went out with some friends to get some Chipotle burritos afterward, and while a friend and I were getting seated, another friend told me that the guy who rang us up asked if I had a boyfriend. I just rolled my eyes and didn't say a word. Then I went to a soccer game...all of this happening after class and lab and whatnot.

So Friday night...this is where the real story is. Anyways, some friend's and I gathered at a friend's apartment eating cake, and having some drinks before we went out. A friend of mine who went to a neighboring school gave us all a ride, since none of us would be in the right mind to...So yeah, we get to the club...and the place is packed...and with some cuties too.

But yeah, it was a great night of dancing. I was surprised at how many guys wanted to dance with me. Like...two years ago, when I would go out with friends, I averaged two guys a night. This Friday...it was at least ten, and even then I would be dancing with one guy...and another guy would grab my arm. I don't do that bent over...hands on the ground kind of dancing or anything of that sorts, so please...don't get the wrong idea lol. But yeah...that happened a couple of times, and trying to accompany friends the bathroom, I would get pulled as well. I guess things have changed in two years (remember I said I didn't really go out last school year)?

But yeah...this one conversation was funny:

Sunglasses in Club Guy: Wow. You are the most beautiful girl that I have seen here. You look different from all the other girls and I've been watching you tonight. I just wanted to talk to you for a bit.
ELNG: Yeah...sure, I bet you say that to all the girls.
SCG: No, really I mean it. I'm not even kidding, you are probably the only one that I will remember tomorrow.
ELNG: Ummm...well you are drunk, so I doubt you will remember me tomorrow.
SCG: You are right, but if I was sober, I would remember you tomorrow.
ELNG: Uhhh...okay.
SCG: You remind me of the girls from back home.
ELNG: Where is home?
SCG: Atlanta
Was that supposed to be a complement?

So then SCG and I dance for a bit...meanwhile he would keep holding onto my dress from the front (he wanted to dance face to face)...and then I guess would keep trying to touch my face? I mean, he would bring his hands up, and I would put my hands up...hard to explain. But yeah...then he asked if he could kiss me, and I said no...he started begging...na wa o, see me see trouble. When he realized I was not going to allow him a kiss, he tried to take it by force. Kept leaning into me...and then I started leaning back...the more I leaned back (his hands were around my waist)...the more he leaned forward. At some point he realized he was not going to get anything and decided to just kiss my forehead. Probably that was the story of my night. But yeah...apart from the usual guys trying to place their hands on places where they don't belong...that was all.

One of my friend's also started getting a little too flirtatious with my friend who gave us a ride. I don't know...I may stop bringing my male friends around her...she wants to flirt with all of them saying that they are all cute. Anyways...I am thinking of setting her up with this guy who has been talking to me lately. I'm not quite sure about this guy...like whether or not he likes me...if he does...I better set them up fast. He's cute, no doubt about it, they are both Ghanaian (not that that is the deciding factor), but I think that they might get along well. So...I'm going to get to work on that.

This male friend of mine thinks that he likes me...actually he and my boyfriend think that every guy likes me. Their idea is "assume every guy likes you unless they prove you wrong." Ladies...do you guys use this kind of thinking? Tell me what you all think. And guys...is this accurate or not?

-ELNG

*P.S. That music tag thing will be coming up in my next post lol.

Coming soon....

After my class today...you will hear the gist.

~ELNG

Boring...

Sorry guys, not much gist for you all because I've been studying for a test which I had today . So I was inside ALL WEEKEND!!!! I know...hard to believe that this party girl didn't go out. Wait...let me not lie, I am not a party girl, so it's typical that I didn't go out lol. But my birthday is this week!!! So expect that to change this weekend.


Actually, I do have a little story to tell. So an ex-boyfriend of mine came down to my city for a party. But get this...this is how I knew....

One of his friends sent me a message, saying that he and some friends were going to be coming down and he wanted people to hang out with. I asked him if I knew any of these friends, and he said no. So I figured that my ex-bf wouldn't be coming, though not to lie...thought it kind of weird that his friend wanted to hang out because I had never seen him, only talked to him on the phone. But I was up for it, don't mind hanging out with people.

So Saturday night comes, his friend calls and I ignore it because I'm studying for a test and I really don't feel like hanging out. My grades are more important lol. So yeah, ignored those calls, but about five calls later, I finally decide to answer it. But mind you that I never stored his number in my phone, so I recognized it by the area code. So I pick up the phone...it was my ex-bf (who I had not seen in 1+ years). He apparently came in the car with his friend who wanted to see me (and his friend just didn't tell me). Probably because he knew that I could have told him to not bother coming. My ex-bf will not leave me alone...calling my phone (after soo long) asking me when I am going to break up with my boyfriend, telling me that he loves me, that he can't get over me, and that he can't be with anyone else, that I only act this way because I know he will always be there for me, that we were meant to get married...and everything under the sun. I am NOT...let me repeat that...NOT NOT NOT NOT will NEVER be interested in going out with him, or taking anything further than it is now.

I don't mind seeing him, but when he wants to see me, he wants to kiss and stuff...and he just understand that I don't want to. I'm like..."I have a boyfriend" and he says that he doesn't care, that he still loves me, that he thinks my boyfriend and I are just a fling and that one day I will come to my senses. He said that he thinks I'm smart enough to realize that one day I will want a Nigerian man so we can raise Nigerian kids...whatever! No matter who I marry, my kids will be Nigerian right (maybe...at least half)?

So yeah, he came by my apartment around 3:00AM in the morning (he had just come from a party...which I am now glad that I did not attend)...I know...bad idea. But I no matter how I feel, I had not seen him in over a year. And he lives two hours away, I don't want to be known as so cold-hearted that I would not see him when he came around. Yeah...he's still the same old same old. Did nothing with him, and for that he calls me mean. Personally, I don't care. I just don't understand how he is so blind to think the way that he does. Anyways...let me not start ranting.

It was my birthday this week! I will post on Saturday to let you all know how it went. By the way...blogger will probably post this by the date when I started...but actually I am posting this Friday morning. Sorry oh...I don't always have internet access for class reasons.

~ELNG

Fourth of July!!!

Happy Fourth of July everyone!!! Well...to those that celebrate it lol. Mine was alright, I'm at school for the summer, so not much that I can actually do. A friend had a picnic yesterday though, so I went over to her apartment to celebrate. I was probably there for about two hours! It was fun, a lot of bugs though.

Then after that, went out to this club...which was soo fun!! I have not been to a club in ages (or any kind of club for that matter)! The deal pretty much is that if my boyfriend doesn't go out, I pretty much don't go out. It's not written or spoken or anything, I just generally feel like I have no point going to a club if he does not come. I find it hard to dance with other guys.

But yeah, so was at the club for probably about two hours, and it was just insane. Maybe my not going out for a while has caused me to forget what to expect. But left and right guys kept asking for my number. Okay...not left and right, so it was like five guys. But I haven't gotten that kind of attention in a while lol. It was like:


The next night (Saturday night...don't mind blogger, I started typing this Saturday morning), I went out to an African club with this friend of mine who kind of likes me. Yeah...I don't know. I have really resigned myself to the fact that I will never have males who really just want to be friends and nothing more. But yeah, the party was fun, it was free drinks and free entry! Got to hear some great African tracks from Naija to Kenya and even some Caribbean stuff!

As for why I say I will never have any males that will be just friends...maybe that's just an exaggeration. I believe that I may get some within the next five-ten years? But as for now...doesn't happen. That story will be saved for another day!

See ya ♥

Frustrated

Oh wow...I can't believe people are still reading this! After like a year! Thanks Jaybabe! You've been there with me since day one :-)

So school has been getting to me...badly. I declared my major in psychology a few months back...and needless to say my parents are upset. It all came out when I went to the dentist a two months ago...

Dentist: So what are you studying in school?
ELNG: Well I am actually majoring in psychology
Mom of ELNG: WHAT?!?! *stares in shock*
ELNG: But I am still going to medical school
Mom of ELNG: She wants to become a medical doctor (still probably in shock)
Dentist: Well...that's good

So yeah...I got a lecture that night from my parents because they were upset with my choice of major. Granted I should have told them what my major was when I declared it, but I was in a rush, and really...it made sense since I had so many psychology courses. In order to major in psychology...or even (double) major in biology , I would have had to stay in school longer.

Last night again...my parents talked to me about how it was such a stupid decision to major in psychology. And that now I have to work extra hard to get into a medical school because if I don't get into medical school then I have nothing to fall back on...etc. Then had to hear the same thing from my mother as well the very next day.

What is it with this obsession that Nigerian families have to have a doctor in them? Should I become a doctor just because my mom feels that we "have to have at least one or two doctors in the family?" That by default makes me have to becomes a doctor. If I have worries, I want real answers. I want them to sit and talk to me and tell me legitimate reasons, like "you were always interested in helping people," or "remember the time when such and such happened, and how it made you want to etc?"
Something like that. Don't say that we need one or two doctors in the family...should that be reason enough for me to go?

Now before anyone says anything...I know they want the best for me...but shouldn't happiness fall in there somewhere as well?

Whatever...this video makes me feel better. Take care everyone!

I'm BACK!!!!

Hey everyone!

Sorry that I kept you all waiting for so long...I feel bad because I had that new post sitting in cyberspace for the past seven months or so? Hmmm... well, it's been bad. I've had a busy year. And I'm taking classes this summer...but I will TRY TRY TRY to have timely posts from now on. Let's see how this goes.

But I really really missed you guys, seriously. It's just my need to get into medical school has kept me away :-(

-ELNG